Adult only. Private by design.
How a host opens the night
Say the format, the end time, and the rooms before anyone has to guess. A private no stays private. A one-sided yes stays hidden.
The short answer
Open the night in about a minute. Name the format, the time it ends, the room that stays dressed, and where phones go. Then stop talking and let people meet. A welcome is not a second invite, and it is not the moment names appear.
You invite the people you would actually let in. One private link per couple. The welcome does not add anyone who was not invited. If a couple brought someone you did not write down, they wait while you decide. Do not sort that out in front of the room.
Adult only. Private by design. You confirm you are 18 or older. The host still checks you in. The street stayed hidden until you sent it. The opening does not put that street into a toast.
What to say in that minute
Four facts. This is a key party, a play party, or a speed date. It ends at the time you already put in the invite. This room stays dressed. Phones stay down, and they are not cameras. People can follow a list. They cannot follow a long speech.
Say whether you are on the list or only hosting. Guests should not have to guess if a hello from you is an invitation. If you are playing, say so. If you are not, say that too. A co-host can stand with you. A co-host cannot delete the party or remove you as the host.
Do not read house rules they already accepted. Point at the one rule people forget, which is usually the room, the phones, or the end time. If you set the play party so couples answer together, say that again. The usual night is one person, one photo and one name. Soft usually stops short of intercourse with someone else. Full includes it. If the house rules draw that line, point at the line. Do not invent a new one at the door.
What not to do in front of the room
Do not announce a match. Do not point at a couple and explain them. Do not joke about who said no. A private no stays private. A one-sided yes stays hidden. The room does not get a list of answers.
Do not send people onto the porch to talk. The porch is not a play room, and it is a poor welcome. Keep the opening inside, in the room you said stays dressed. Neighbors do not need a speech, and a group standing on the step is how a private night stops being private.
If someone looks lost, talk to them after, not during the minute. A welcome is not a tour of every guest. A note to you is private. Only you and your co-hosts see it. Guests do not message each other in a side thread. If the night feels wrong once people are in, they can tell you then. That note stays with you.
Name the format they actually have
A match exists only when both sides said yes. Say which night this is, because the room sees that match in a different way. People packed for the night they were told. If you changed the format after the invite, say the new one now, and say it was a change.
A key party is one shared reveal. You start it when the room is ready. Phones wait about ten seconds. The room sees one person, only if both people said yes. A later round is still one person at a time. Your own partner is never someone you answer about. You do not read that name out loud before the phones do.
A play party has no pairing for the whole room. You close the answers, check people in, and then you open the matches. Checking someone in does not open the names by itself. Each checked-in guest then sees every person where both said yes, one person at a time. Say that in the minute so nobody waits for a shared reveal that is not coming.
A speed date is short rounds, then yes or no. A new party starts at five minutes a round, and you can change the length, pause, add time, or skip. Either partner can answer until you start the next round. A match needs both couples to say yes. The screen shows both names and one couple photo. The welcome is before the first round. It is not the reveal.
After the minute
Check people in yourself, or with a co-host who is already on the list. Guests show a door code or a QR pass. They cannot check themselves in. On a key party, check-in opens on party day after answers close. On a play party, check-in is a step you take before you open the matches. On a speed date, the first round starts when you start it.
Then get out of the middle of the room. A host who keeps talking is a host who delays the night they just described. If you are playing, you can join the list you already named. If you are only hosting, stay easy to find and stay out of the pairs. The clothes-on room is where a guest can stand and talk. Point at it once, then leave it alone.
When the list is real, open the host home and run the night from there. The hosting help walks through the door, the answers, and the moment you open matches. This page is only the minute at the start. A private no stays private either way.
FAQ
Do guests already know the format?
They should, from the invite. Say it anyway. People forget on the drive, and a new guest may have heard it secondhand. Name a key party, a play party, or a speed date.
Do I announce the matches?
No. A name appears only when both people said yes, and only in the way that format works. You do not read a list of yeses to the room. A private no stays private.
What if I am also playing?
Say so in the minute. Guests should know whether you are on the list. If you are only hosting, say that too. Your own partner is never someone you answer about on a key party or a play party.
How long should the welcome be?
About a minute. Format, end time, the dressed room, phones. Then let people talk.
Can I skip the welcome?
Then people invent the rules. Say the four facts. A one-sided yes stays hidden either way, but the rooms should not be a guess. Start hosting from the list you already wrote.
When the list is ready, you can host a key party, host a play party, or host a couples speed date. You can start hosting from your own list.